Bort's Jorts @tjmuessig@radical.town

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Schrödinger's Giants

Gamestop? Yeah, I wish they WOULD.

Tiger King but instead of exotic big cats it's a docudrama about crime, abuse, accusations, murder, and dirty dealing in the wild world of the fast food hamburger industry. Still working on the title.

L. Ron Jeremy

Franken Stein Country 2: Igor's Organ Quest

Kids these days are playing too much Animal Crossing and not praying enough by sign-of-the-crossing.

Martin Monday
Tossed Salad Tuesday
Where's Maris Wednesday
Therapy Thursday
Frasier Friday
Seattle Saturday
Scrambled Eggs Sunday

Neckflicks

... because they snap people's necks, get it? Comedy jokes.

Thank you for coming to my lecture. To begin with, the primary concept I would like to communicate to you tonight is that, far and away, the most important quality of a game console is it's shape. Game*cube*, X*box*, the beautiful rectangularity of the NES. To put it simply, dear friends, a console must not stray from the divine proportions of the rectangular box. For if it becomes too curvy, it begins to look like a toilet. See the Atari Jaguar, with it's add-ons...

David "Babbling" Brooks

Battleshart Galacticass

Everybody's joking around like "Hey y'all remember doin' stuff?" and I'm like "No."

I said it before, but I'll say it again:

Shid Rock

I'm playing through Pathologic Classic HD for the first time, cuz y'know that seems like an appropriate thing to do right now.

The incredible thing about this game is that so few people have played it, there very few FAQs and walkthroughs on the internet, and the ones that do exist are not very detailed. You won't find that much help to get through this very long, torturous experience. Kinda like life.

Karl Marth

Be sure to invite me to your Halloween party this year, so I can ruin it by going around to every single person and telling them "Dracula is just Goth Borat."

Um, I checked Wikipedia and it's vague, so... did Peterson ever wake up?