Shouldn't long johns just be called johnathans?

It confused the antiquated computer system and instead of alerting me it was just like, "talk to a person, iono"

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Apparently the reason it didn't just go through online is that I put in my job's name rather than the company that technically employs me, which I was unaware of and is also not what appears on my pay stubs

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I forgot to tell you guys I finally got through to unemployment earlier after a few calls

Tradcath is short for "traditional Cathy," and it refers to people who say "Ack!" a lot but are not religiously observant

The last time a March was this long, Moses was trying to find the promised land

I got a late start at failing to get through to finish my unemployment claim today

The line on an unreleased Kanye song where he says, "You niggas still shop at Uniqlo/Got a father-in-law that's unisex," makes me think Kanye does not understand gender issues very well

You've all seen Westworld, but what about Wesworld, the show about the robot theme park where people pay top dollar to experience being royal Tenenbaums and things of that nature?

I was trying to avoid making a post like this, but my roommate who covered our first payment to the landlords is asking for money, there doesn't look like there's gonna be any relief coming for those of us who are still employed but had all our hours cut, and there doesn't look like there's gonna be any rent relief or stoppage. I have one paycheck coming Friday, and then nothing. If there's anything anyone can do to help (sharing, donating, letting me know about resources I haven't heard about), I would really appreciate it.
Venmo: @steviemcfly
Cash App: $steviexmcfly

The socks have nothing to do with why I'm drunk but they were part of the story

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A homeless dude who introduced himself when I was smoking a cigarette earlier asked for food and socks, so I made him sandwiches with my leftovers and gave him a pair of socks, and now I am drunker quicker than I had anticipated

I just want very pretty people I don't know to stare at me and whisper to their friends until I go home alone

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I did not realize how much I needed attractive strangers to give me attention until this pandemic

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