Sticky toot

imagining someone at a Gamer Chair company saying "what if we made one of these just in black, without garish colors or bizarre protrusions" and immediately getting kicked in the asshole by their superiors

hummingbirds:
like an ounce heavy
fueled by sugar water
rapid heartbeat

me:
all that stuff but cooler

*pretend I am a youth pastor with the worst undercut in existence* okay so when you're born you're cancelled. It is only when you baptize yourself you can become an unproblematic queen/king/monarch

DOCTOR, GREETING ME AFTER I WAKE UP FROM A 20 YEAR COMA: Welcome sir, you've been in a coma for 20 years after you fell down 50 flights of stairs into a bomb factory. We've had to do massive prosthesis work on you to keep you alive
ME, LOOKING DOWN TO SEE THE LEFT HALF OF ME IS ALL METAL: Ah fuck this rules doesn't it?
DOCTOR, LOOKING AT HIS CLIPBOARD AND BACK TO ME: It extremely does sir

going absolutely apeshit at the idea of a white person in their 2 million dollar house becoming slightly uncomfortable about the wholesale incarceration of brown people at the border for just trying to fuckin live.

im howlin thinking about how this person may have a very slight uncomfortable questioning of the world and how it works

im pop locking and fully breakdancing thinking about this person being slightly worried about their children are parsing these happenings

:bing: Melted Funko Pop On Accident Is Breatheing In Smoke Dangerous

:bing: funko pop smoke inhalation poison control center

@healyn look at this albert einstein lookin motherfucker, you look like a dog fucked a nerd. go eat a leaf.

an american presidential candidate who helps me clean my ass, call him bidet

there was this one asshole at the pool, lifeguard, name of Joe Biden..

there was this one fucker at the pool, went by the name of Count Chocula, that’s how they named people way back then

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Radical Town

A cool and chill place for cool and chill people.