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The pinnacle of my ambitions is finding a nice place to get lunch regularly.

@comradetaylorswift @Red with luck, this policy will get them to dispose of their militias and consensually grab someone else's genitals instead

we can use all of the sweat they and the other horndogs generate for hydroelectric power to run our massive data centers

@comradetaylorswift @larrydavis while i agree that over zealous hornt tooters have ruined this great nation, i also must sympathize with our founding fathers eugen, being a young German code monkey. My platform would focus on the true chuds and leave the honest, hard working thirsters to their own devices

@comradetaylorswift
Uhhh, my number one priority is to put Eugen in a stockade and have people throw tomatoes at him due to his uncontrollable horniness.

Number two, soda in all the drinking fountains.

Welcome to the 2019 Mastodon presidential debate, here at the beautiful KNZK Memorial auditorium in downtown Radical Town, brought to you by Jorts Horse Emporium. Jorts Horse Emporium: Jorts, for Horses.

Each candidate will be given 1,000 characters to make an opening statement. When you're done, please tag your political rival. Senator @larrydavis, as you are currently at the top of my Home feed, you may begin.

i love browsing mastodon on my computer and thinking "ok time for a break", leaning back in my chair and opening mastodon on my phone

is anyone else watching this or am i the only one punishing myself

when they ask Marianne Williamson a question about reparations and the crystal on her necklace starts glowing

@comradetaylorswift after the great vape calamity moisture levels in the earth atmosphere tripled meaning very high concentration rates.

women in sci fi movies - why is their hair always wet?

love too be interviewed about my crimes while standing neck deep in my infinity pool

a friend suggested I watch The Big Hack and six seconds in im already reevaluating this friendship

@comradetaylorswift flesh-tone cover-up followed by the new tattoo you want?

I’m not kidding when I say my greatest fear is running out of real estate and only then having The Best Idea for another tattoo

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Radical Town

A cool and chill place for cool and chill people.