Quick tip, don’t store gunpowder in a coffee container
At least rip the label off or paint it a different color
I’m fine, but I might need a new coffeemaker
*puttering around the kitchen half awake*
“What smells like brimstone?”
*goes to put coffee container back...but...there’s already a coffee container in the cabinet*
In my defense:
This is much worse than the time I put a tablespoon of Angostura bitters in my hamburgers instead of Worcestershire sauce
@RobinHood 😳 oh no
@RobinHood ROBIN WHAT DID YOU DO.
@RobinHood did you load coffee in your shotgun shells?
@RobinHood oh noooo
@RobinHood OK but we're skipping the most important question. how does gunpowder "coffee" taste
@wolfpede look, I’m just one of those weirdos who doesn’t do a big deep Folgers commercial sniff every time I open the can
@RobinHood i guess i just thought that gunpowder smells more strongly, must be remembering wrong lol
@wolfpede it does, but usually post ignition. Also, coffee cans smell very strongly of coffee. Also, I was big sleepy and needed coffee
@RobinHood oh gods dammit Robin.
@RobinHood yeah I’ve had days where normal coffee doesn’t work for me too
@RobinHood when can I expect to see a young guy with a full beard and handlebar mustache selling gunpowder coffee at the farmers market?
Why would you be in a position where, tired, you are able to pick your gunpowder stash and think it's coffee.
Like, why are they kept so close to one another o.o
@furkachi it was on the kitchen table. I had to transfer the gunpowder to a new container, because the seal wore out on the old one. I did the transfer over the trash can and then just set the can down. Mistakes were made
@RobinHood Ah that makes a lot more sense xD
@RobinHood "oh that doesn't sound TOO bad"
"oh wait he said a TABLESPOON"
@RobinHood oh my God
@RobinHood New from Folger's, let our concentrated Firepower Brew give you an *explosive* start to your day!
@RobinHood ...You really are a leftist himbo, ain't'cha?
@Kyresti they were noticeably bitter, but edible once assembled into a finished burger
You are a parody of yourself and I love it.
@RobinHood mistakes I had never even conceived of have been made
@RobinHood okay now i'm curious what the resultant "coffee" tastes like but also drinking it would probably be a bad idea
@RobinHood oh no
@RobinHood is that what they call black coffee 😂
@RobinHood are you saying that caffeine and gunpowder are *not* the same thing?
@RobinHood talk about a shot of espresso!
@RobinHood nice hot cup of gunwater
@RobinHood but it's tasty
@RobinHood I've brushed my teeth with styling paste before, so you do you...
@RobinHood no this isn't what they meant by "bulletproof coffee", they just meant adding butter
@RobinHood I feel like this problem would've been averted if you'd kept your coffee can full of gunpowder in a different cabinet than your coffee can full of coffee?
@RobinHood nvm I read downthread.
@RobinHood is this some kind of American joke I am too European to understand? 🤔
@AdalwinAmillion they look very similar, and I may have accidentally put gunpowder in my coffeemaker this morning
@RobinHood And here I thought the medieval fox would die from a cold.
@RobinHood you'll get explosive diarrhea
@RobinHood *what did you do*
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