*puttering around the kitchen half awake*

β€œWhat smells like brimstone?”

*goes to put coffee container back...but...there’s already a coffee container in the cabinet*

β€œα΅’Κ° ⁿᡒ”

Show thread

This is much worse than the time I put a tablespoon of Angostura bitters in my hamburgers instead of Worcestershire sauce

Show thread

@Thomas @RobinHood :: loads shotgun :: "These varmints better be ready for a *real* wake-up call"

@wednesday @RobinHood I bet it'd hurt like fuck. Maybe not as bad as rock salt, but rough

@RobinHood OK but we're skipping the most important question. how does gunpowder "coffee" taste

@wolfpede look, I’m just one of those weirdos who doesn’t do a big deep Folgers commercial sniff every time I open the can

@RobinHood i guess i just thought that gunpowder smells more strongly, must be remembering wrong lol

@wolfpede it does, but usually post ignition. Also, coffee cans smell very strongly of coffee. Also, I was big sleepy and needed coffee

@RobinHood yeah I’ve had days where normal coffee doesn’t work for me too

@RobinHood when can I expect to see a young guy with a full beard and handlebar mustache selling gunpowder coffee at the farmers market?


Why would you be in a position where, tired, you are able to pick your gunpowder stash and think it's coffee.

Like, why are they kept so close to one another o.o

@furkachi it was on the kitchen table. I had to transfer the gunpowder to a new container, because the seal wore out on the old one. I did the transfer over the trash can and then just set the can down. Mistakes were made

@RobinHood "oh that doesn't sound TOO bad"

"oh wait he said a TABLESPOON"

@RobinHood New from Folger's, let our concentrated Firepower Brew give you an *explosive* start to your day!

@RobinHood ...You really are a leftist himbo, ain't'cha? :blobyeengrin:

@LexYeen @RobinHood Thank you, I kinda needed the laugh! XP I mean my sympathies, but still it seems like something any of us would've done were we a little more rural.

Say, how did those burgers actually taste? I'm morbidly curious

@RobinHood mistakes I had never even conceived of have been made

@RobinHood okay now i'm curious what the resultant "coffee" tastes like but also drinking it would probably be a bad idea

@RobinHood :blobhyperthink: are you saying that caffeine and gunpowder are *not* the same thing?

@RobinHood I've brushed my teeth with styling paste before, so you do you...

@RobinHood no this isn't what they meant by "bulletproof coffee", they just meant adding butter

@RobinHood I feel like this problem would've been averted if you'd kept your coffee can full of gunpowder in a different cabinet than your coffee can full of coffee?

@RobinHood is this some kind of American joke I am too European to understand? πŸ€”

@AdalwinAmillion they look very similar, and I may have accidentally put gunpowder in my coffeemaker this morning

@RobinHood And here I thought the medieval fox would die from a cold.

Sign in to participate in the conversation
Radical Town

A cool and chill place for cool and chill people.