the intern just sent me the worst url that i have ever seen in my entire life and now i have to share it with you.

i apologize in advance for the knowledge i am about to bestow upon you.

it is not fair. it is not right.

i am giving you the opportunity to block me now, to preserve some part of your soul you cannot get back.

soon it will be too late

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

arbys has made a carrot out of fucking MEAT. i am so fucking sorry

here is the marrot (meat carrot)

qsrmagazine.com/menu-innovatio

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

it tastes like a carrot

it is made of FUCKING turkey breast

and in this video, they dip it in ranch vimeo.com/344324877

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EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

Taylor said Arby’s would “continue to innovate in the space of meat craft that never existed before in ways that are surprising and delicious and exceed the expectations of what you can get through a drive thru.”

FUCK YOU you fucking food pervert. this SUCKS and you kNOW it

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EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

imagine chewing up a thick, juicy, wet, meaty marrot in your mouth. imagine sucking it down whole, like a hot dog. all the way down to the parsley sprig at the end. fuck this

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EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

"megetables". im gonna fucking yartz

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@HYPERLINK this is like REVERSE EVERYTHING THAT EVERYONE HAS BEEN TRYING TO DO

re: EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK I have never trusted Arby's. They are an institution of the Apocalypse.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK this looks like it just has the worst texture possible

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK oh.

This isn't anything near as bad as I thought it'd be. This is Peak Arby's but. Yeah idk. I was braced for nightmares.

@HYPERLINK yeah I got nothin!

I feel like I should be sorry

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK are these available for purchase

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@Ope no. they are just Fucking bragging

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK Teasing

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK I'm afraid that Ive completely run out of ways to express my displeasure with this

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@nuttgodd i am beyond anger and straight into fear

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK whoever said "hey we should sous vide a turkey log and roll it in dried carrot juice and then roast it" needs to be removed from existence

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food also lewd now 

@HYPERLINK also I'm referring to my junk as a marrot from now on

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK I've been informed there is a Jenna marbles video called "corn on the cob but instead of the corn bone it's a hotdog"

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@nuttgodd @HYPERLINK extreme chaotic energy

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK @nuttgodd

Pinterest probably has a copy of that Sixties Metrecal ad where some poor slob is "carving" a soupy bowl of tepid fake strawberry lo-cal slurry w/a knife and fork. I still think that might be worse. But I'm old.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK
turkarrots in orange-ginger glaze
honey-roasted turkarrots
creamy turkarrot soup

oh god

turkarrot cake with cream cheese frosting

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@nosimpleway i am already dead

re: EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@nosimpleway @HYPERLINK Turkarrot wrapped in bacon

re: EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@clarjon1 @nosimpleway @HYPERLINK

[Richard Harris:]

🎶 "Turkarrrott,
Turkarrrott,
I know it sounds a bit bizarre..." 🎶

[/RH]

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK
Turkarrot cake with Ranch frosting

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK
I can use my culinary degree for good or for evil, and I'm sorry but I've made my choice

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK I will devour all of their lineage. all who did this. their blood will no longer flow. I will consume their sin and it will be cleansed by acid and fire. at least it will be more palatable than a megetable.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK
seems like a waste of good meat to me. why bother

now if you could make a carrot taste like turkey, i'd be interested

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK
i JUST woke up hyperlink and im already convulsing egregiously from this.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK

[fumes]

Damn you, ch! Kink shaming has no place on Fedi! (Oh, wait this is Arby's we're talking about? Never mind. Shame away.)

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK awful graphic imagination for something so awful

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK Justin McElroy is gonna blow a gasket

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@Ope @HYPERLINK

You could make a bundle marketing this to the geniuses who think soy is going to spontaneously change their gender against their will. :/

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK OH FUCK OFH HGJSF GOD NO STOP I HATE THAT

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK ah yes. inverted vegetarianism. i love it /s

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK you know? I was looking at this thinking “well I already dislike carrots maybe I’ll like this better” and then I read and saw this and got food poisoning

re: EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK hey uh wasn't the food of the future supposed to be the other way round so we wouldn't have to pour so many resources into livestock

hmm. i absolutely hate this, thanks

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK god has come to reap the sinners

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK

LOL. So... a hot dog for people who are bored w/hot dogs but not bored enough to eat more actual vegetables.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK

But in its defense, there's no gold leaf on it. ;)

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK the only correct response to this is "death do America"

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK treat

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK JESUS FUCK ING CHRIST

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK time for carrot cake

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@Ope HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK i mean it would practically be a fun meatloaf

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@Ope they make it taste like a fucking carrot

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Hm.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK Cooked carrot I presume.

Yeah, in with the roast it goes.

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@HYPERLINK squeezing a marrot from toe to tip to extract the Meat

EXTREMELY EXTREMELY HOLY FUCK cursed food 

@007 @HYPERLINK slurping it like a gogurt and discarding the husk in the trash

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