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sexual liberation movements are not for cishet men! they are already sexually liberated! in fact they have too much freedom to do harm and that's the freakin problem!!!

@wintgenstein men be like "how dare you turn down my unsolicited advances. don't be such a prude"

@Aleums men be like : here's step one to liberating yourself: suck my dick

@Aleums @wintgenstein "Ah, I see that although you will go for people who are not me, you will not show interest to me specifically. This really says something, not just about us, or this situation, but about everyone I ever feel any degree of attraction to, and how they treat everyone whom I consider my in-group. That definitely is a statement which makes sense, and surely there is no relationship between me making this statement & you turning me down. Hmph, so much for sexual liberation..."

@Colophonscrawl @Aleums oh? you're busy that day? actually i never really liked you and you were ugly and also you're a total bitch

@wintgenstein @Aleums "U r such a perfect goddess, I would go out of my way specifically to daily shower you with praise, and I would even be willing to consider acting more tacit about my expectations regarding the various tasks I will be giving to you. In addition, I have a source of income, and--hello? Did I just sense any degree of disagreement or lack of interest? I ***knew it!*** It's the global conspiracy against me personally, isn't it? Curses! Foiled again in my gentlemanly quest!"

@Aleums
I think if they focused on breaking down stigmas regarding what is considered to not fall in line with their preconceived notions of what being cishet men are, then it could count...but only in that regard...

@Demonsthenes13 @Aleums the space of how cishet men are socially allowed to express sexuality is pretty limited to being "dominant" and "initiating" hence why it's so harmful

@zardoz @Demonsthenes13 cosigned. Rigid bullshit hurts everyone, but we have to center victims in any movement for there to be real change

@Aleums @Demonsthenes13 well who is a victim of sexual ummmm non-liberation (whatever the word is)? It doesn't seem as well-defined as a victim of rape culture or sexism etc.

@zardoz @Demonsthenes13 this is kinda weird to talk about since there's no well-defined popular sexual liberation movement to discuss atm

@Aleums @Demonsthenes13 there are many victims of past "sexual liberation" movements, but that's like the inverse problem

@Aleums
I get it...the sexual liberation movements have had their share of being overrun by the entitlements of the cishet men faction (which said entitlement is another thing that needs introspection on to further be free because the downfall of their own selves is usually summed up in bitter resentment that what they were "promised" essentially wasn't offered on the silver platter)
@zardoz

@Demonsthenes13 @Aleums yeah there's a long history of men going "hey this means I can get easy sex right?" and it goes to shit instantly.

@zardoz
Yes I realize these preconceptions exist, thus my statement...but thank you for providing examples...others include need for poorer hygeine, being domestically challenged, etc.
@Aleums

@Aleums social pressure is also a big part of the problem and it affects the cishet dudes... this can't be treated without nuance

@efi of course. They certainly have a role to play, and it's not like they don't stand to benefit from an improvement in sexual politics - deconstructing the patriarchal roles that dominate sexual relations leaves everyone more free. But they cannot be at the center of any movement that purports to make a meaningful difference.

@Aleums this, however, is a very distant statement from your previous one
they can't be at the center, yes, but "it's not for them" means they shouldn't be included at all... or am I missing something?

@efi I was being hyperbolic for effect, but I don't think my two statements necessarily disagree with each other.

@Aleums I am very wary of hyperbole on serious issues because it can foster maniqueism and deepen the problem, but ymmv

@Aleums I remember a miserable birtthday party where a beardo told me, "You need to be less repressed." I wonder how he feels now about me being a polyamorous, queer trans man.

@Aleums me and my coworkers were just talking about jeremy soule. like did you read the shit he was accused of saying. absolutely wild. cishet men need to be sexually aslept

@dankwraith was this from August last year? Or did he say more shit since then?

@dankwraith it's stomach churning when you hear that a guy like him had been getting away with it for years

@Aleums he was extremely influential in the industry which is probably what protected him for so long, but like... it's so egregious

@Aleums “haha hope you’re doing well I agree with you on being sex positive that’s great in my opinion my DMs are open btw “

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